Friends AFTER the break up??

it is always good to maintain a civil relationship after the romantic part is over but that rarely happens. the reason i believe is because u must have a friendship that goes beyond the romance which is where respect and trust anchor. if there is no friendship to begin with then when the romance is over so is everything else.

It depends how much heartache and hard feelings the other party caused. And also if you both can agree to be just friends, like someone said one or the other sometimes wants to get back together because it feels comfortable and you know what to expect with that person. But the same ole problems will still be there no matter what you do. My experience has been to move on and dont waste any more time with that person.

Open your eyes and heart for someone new!!!!!

Originally Posted by chattykat

Not me.................. One of the two usually wants to get back.

Agreed..... Gets kind of awkward afterwards...friendly if you run into them yes but friends no....

Originally Posted by abbygirl09

just curious..

How many of you truely believe a man and woman can end a long term relationship and remain friends?

I can not speak for other people, but I did it sveral times. After I was divorced the first time former wife was for many years one of my best friends, the same happened with girl friends. It is so easy to walk away in a fight, it is much more keep a friendship after the relation. Did one not love each other for a certain time? Why to destroy part of a good memory? I admitt, it is quite difficullt to keep friendship after the love is gone, but it is possible.

Well, I think in a lot ,if not most, deep relationships that end there will always be at least one thing or two that will be either desirable or too intimate to level it down to a platonic friendship. When you get to that certain point, most people view it as an all or nothing thing. If we were to be together for example, and for whatever reason , the dynamics and outcome changed, then I know I , for one could not be objective enough for friendship,at least not initially and for quite some time as well. And to be perfectly frank, I may never be.It's not not moving on, or lack of maturity, but if something was ALMOST good enough, but not quite, then it would be too tempting to remain around it. My viewpoint, how I tick.

Depends on how the relationship ended, who ended it and why it ended. Bad break ups usually mean no friendship because there's bitterness and acrimony that needs to be worked out. Amicable breakups usually allow for some type of friendship especially when you genuinely liked each other. If the relationship was based on just sex and you didn't spend a lot of time outside of the bedroom friendship would be difficult.

i meet my boyfrien in singles net that was a good experience!but after we move in togetheri found out that hi is friend with his exs,is no cool to me at all cuz what kind of girl wnat to hear them boyfriend cell ringing all the time from his stupid exs? no way ;i really believe in loyalty,honestly and RESPECT! i do believe that anyone have the right of be treated the same you tread the others ,im 100% agree with somebody that said"to be friends with exs is not healhty for a new relationship ",is always good to cut totally with the past;if you have kids is gotta be a little diffrence but still the exs have to as far away from each other cuzz that way then can start something new with somebody ;PLEASE GUYS AND GIRLS CUT THE PAST BE HAPPY WITH YOUR PRESENT ESP IF YOU FI ND WHAT YOU WAS LOOKING FOR!!!!

I agree, hearing a phone ring ALL the time with X's calling isn't right,
Now n then talking to Xs is ok,
But you need trust on both sides of this table,
I don't ring up my Xs all the time,
But cutting the past and forgetting it, that's not right,
if you have had nothing but long term relationships, then the time spent is part of your life, and what got yu to where you are today,
and it's very hard to make confersations if you can't even speak of your past from time to time, and I'mnot talking doing it everyday like your dwelling on it or something.
Most of my past and the things I've done were never done alone,
and if you can't reflect back on stories of your past because who you are with gets all pissy about it, then screw um if they can't accept the fact
that just maybe you had fun with someone else prior to them.
The same thing goes for pictures, why make your g/f or b/f destroy them?
I'm not meaning it's ok to have them plastered all over the house, but keeping them is not wrong either, and if you are so insecure <spelling that you have to make them do this, then maybe you just need to sit back a minute and figure this shit out.
My X wife was the worse at this, even after we spent another three years together, and she was branded My X Bitch Wife for a long time after I got smart and left the second time.
Some of my Xs i can talk to, and some are just weirded out and won't talk at all.
But I guess it's each to thier own, you either talk to um or you don't or can or can't.
I'd rather trust someone enough to talk to Xs then have them sneeking around behind my back doing it...

I beleive its not a good thing if you are trying to start a new relationship with someone else,new girlfreinds dont appreciate ex girl freinds being in the picture.thats from my experience.

Originally Posted by drywallal

i beleive its not a good thing if you are trying to start a new relationship with someone else,new girlfreinds dont appreciate ex girl freinds being in the picture.thats from my experience.

a man sister!!